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If you’re not from Sydney, let me let you in on a little secret: if there’s a night time market, we’ll be there. Night Noodle Markets. The markets at Carriageworks where they set everything on fire. The Sydney Fish Market 36 Hour Seafood Marathon. WE LOVE IT. You can’t hold us back from any event in Sydney which actually feels alive after dark. No punching on, just punching prawns.

The Sydney Fish Market marathon is unrivaled in experience in that it’s so alien seeing something so familiar, but beneath the veil of midnight. It’s like going to a bakery at 11pm, or hitting up a kebab shop for brunch. Instead of harsh sun, everything glows green.

I was expecting a frantically busy experience, but I soon remembered it’s always frantic at the Sydney Fish Market. Inside it looked as usual albeit a little more stocked: hurried but capable staff, obscene mounds of prawns, enthusiastic customers. Dewy tinsel dangling above the dank floors pointing downwards at buckets of whole fish. The clammy queue for aburi scallops and midnight mangos. The silent fishing boats and everybody struggling to park amongst the more eager of us dragging stacked eskies of good stuff home.

There were no grand haul plans from me, I only visited for a late, late dinner and to buy some strawberries for a Christmas pavlova: but it’s worth visiting if only to watch people enjoying midnight oysters below the glow of the crammed ANZAC Bridge that gets them there.

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Christmas Celebration Pavlova

Hello lovelies! How did December catch up with us so quickly? With the Christmas season amongst us I thought it only appropriate to share one of my festive recipes with you all!
Ok, ok, ok, ok, I need this, I need to feel good about myself and my life, I need to grow my paltry number of followers, I gotta make my blog big and presence known, I need influencer status, I want free stuff, I want fame by way of minimal effort, I want to flourish online not offline, I want to feel adored for all that I choose to share, I need this, I need this…

How many times have you been sweating in the kitchen preparing Christmas lunch for your family and friends? Cheese platter to arrange? Prawns to buy and ham to glaze? Dressing a pavlova for dessert? It’s so hard, and not everybody can cook with the efficiency of Curtis Stone!
Am I sounding like a relatable housewife enough?? Cooking-is-hard-but-I-totally-get-it-here’s-a-fun-and-simple-solution? I am here to help these plebs with my amazing food. Bow down, peasants. The world needs this content and the world needs me. The algorithm can’t stop me, NOTHING can stop me.

I’ve come up with an amazing, time-saving recipe incorporating all the things we love about Christmas – it’s a fabulous 3-in-1 assembly-only dish using readily available products from the nearest supermarket. Easy to prepare with a real, rustic flair. An absolute celebration of the greatest time of year. Yummy!
I am awesome, this is totally happening, they are going to throw so many free stand mixers at me for this. Airlines will be all over me. Guest spots, magazine features, book deals. I’ll have more #spon opportunities and free dinners than ANYBODY ahahahah ahhhhh I’m going to be tagging the shit out of big brands for big coin the moment I hit ‘publish’. My new life begins now.

Christmas Celebration Pavlova AKA Prawn Pavlova
2x pavlova bases
2x 600ml cream
Thousand Island dressing
200g shaved ham
1/2 kilo prawns, cooked and unpeeled
1 cup of cherries, stem on
400g tasty cheese, cubed
2 sticks of cabanossi
1 can passionfruit pulp
Candy canes
Lindt balls
Icing Sugar

1. Whip your cream until soft peaks form. Remove half and gently fold through a few generous squirts of Thousand Island dressing to create a gorgeous ripple effect.
2. Place one pavlova base on your cake stand. In rustic spoonfuls, dollop the rippled cream around the base and into the middle.
3. Layer folded slices of shaved ham over the cream.
4. Add the other pavlova base and layer the remaining half of the cream.
5. In generous handfuls, adorn the cake with your prawns. The more antennae, the better! Then add the cherries – their long stems mimic the peachy prawn antennae and intertwine like gorgeous branches – followed by the cubes of cheese.
6. In a squishy flourish, dress the prawns with more Thousand Island dressing. Gently push a long cabanossi stick into the pavlova base, then drizzle over passionfruit pulp with a teaspoon.
Oh fuck oh shit oh jeez it’s toppling over oh no it’s all falling nnNNNNOOOOOO
7. Candy canes! Throw them at the pavlova. From a distance, I don’t care. Same with any other festive candy you have in the cupboard, like these Lindt balls. Yes, so shiny.
Thank goodness, it’s festive again. I’m a genius ha ha ha ha oh noo it’s still crumbling ahhHHH SHIII-
8. Take a, uhh, big stick of uncut cheese and just really shove it in there. ADD MORE CABANOSSI BECAUSE IT’S RED, RED FOR CHRISTMAS.
It’s still good, it’s still good, it’s still good: you are NOT a failure, you are popular and likeable with ‘grammable content, you are popular and likeable with ‘grammable content…
9. Sprinkle with icing sugar! It’s snowing! I know we live in Australia but make it SNOW because IT’S WHAT THEY DO IN THE MAGAZINES
10. Let the disgusting cavity of the thing consume you and allow the social media likes, no matter how feeble, fuel you for yet another day. Uh, I mean…
10. Spoon generous serves in lovely bowls for all your guests to enjoy ensuring there’s a bit of everything in each portion.
I am sick. I need help.

Christmas Celebration PavlovaChristmas Celebration Pavlova

If you enjoy the recipe, don’t forget to like and share! You can also check out my Instagram video for this post!
I HATE MY LIFE, I DON’T WANT TO BE A NOBODY ANYMORE

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Multiracial life is an interesting one. People on the street sometimes speak to me in languages I don’t understand and my dual appearance often has me feeling uncomfortable in my own, somewhat tanned skin as I fit neither here nor there. Back in the old MySpace days I found their “nationality” profile section insufficient. In Japan I was mistaken for being French and in France I was mistaken for being Italian. I was paid out for having a big nose as a child but these days I’m complimented on my coveted, high cheekbones. The symbol of a watermelon as a prelude for party-times is ingrained in every thread of my being and the number of times sweet old gentlemen have approached me with “YOU GRIK GAHL?” is a relentless joy, both a blessing and a curse.

My amazing plan this week was to document both sides of my family, The Egyptians and The Cypriots, and how their Christmas celebrations draw exciting parallels despite their geographic difference; food served in loved Bessemer, lunch of both traditional and modern dishes, watermelon. When I first began this blog my intention was to highlight my colourful ethnic background illustrating these sorts of get-togethers but in almost one-and-a-half years nothing of the sort ever eventuated. Until now. My amazing plan fell short of amazing as I hadn’t factored in the amazing food coma element. Cameras and food, man. My eye for symmetry blurred significantly under the weight of BBQ lamb, chicken, duck, molokhia, fresh seafood, ham, kashk, stuffed tomato, my Teta’s famous crème caramel and more (I feel heavy). But I tried. I tried and then I fell asleep on a couch somewhere. I think my brother summed it up best in an instagram post simply captioned Dat wog lunch :’). Oh well, better luck next year.


















I wish you all the best time this holiday season, enjoy your time off, enjoy time with your friends and family and I’ll see you all in the new year with some new recipe posts. :)

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Festive Peppermint Hot Chocolate

It’s been one of those days. I’m wearing odd socks. I’ve uttered the term “IDGAF” to so many people today I am properly offending my very own sensibilities.

I demand COMFORT FOOD. And yes, anytime I type this phrase it is always in CAPITAL LETTERS ‘cos it’s kind of a BIG DEAL.

Festive Peppermint Hot Chocolate

I toyed with the idea of buying a mint pattie for myself earlier today at the supermarket for a split second, a decision I would live to regret; on the way home I was flooded by a remorse so deep I may have shed a teeny-tiny tear. Ravaged by this soul-destroying guilt I foraged around the pantry and found some leftover candy canes from my gingerbread house building venture a few days ago. I was craving peppermint and chocolate so badly I was willing to cast off the shackles of soy-based-beverage oppression that so constantly plagues my delicious lifestyle. The rest, as they say, is history. Quick, easy history.

Festive Peppermint Hot Chocolate

Festive Peppermint Hot Chocolate

The candy cane serves as lovely stirring utensil if you’re one to take your time enjoying a mug of hugs. If you’re in the company of anyone who doesn’t particularly enjoy peppermint however (a most unfortunate affliction) the candy cane can always be omitted as it is the sole source of peppermint in this recipe.

Festive Peppermint Hot ChocolateThis recipe follows my golden rule of cookery; where this is chocolate there must be salt. It’s basic ying and yang! This recipe will serve one comforting mug or two smaller shots if you’re in a generous, sharing mood.

 

FESTIVE PEPPERMINT HOT CHOCOLATE

(an original recipe)

3/4 cup milk

50 g chocolate (I used half dark, half milk)

pinch of salt

1 or 2 candy canes, curve removed

 

1. In a heat-proof bowl microwave milk until it is very hot (around one minute).

2. Chop your chocolate and once the milk is ready add to bowl and stir until melted and combined (a few flecks of chocolate may remain). Add salt.

3. Pour into glasses and adorn with can upside-down candy cane.

Festive Peppermint Hot Chocolate

Now, somebody please tell my brother if he doesn’t arrive home soon I’m drinking his for him.

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It’s December! Which marks this month as my very first Christmas as a recipe/food/baking/WHATEVER blogger – all photography from here on in will feature GREEN, RED, CUTENESS, SPARKLES, BAUBLES, etc etc.

Tonight I’m off to an annual Christmas  dinner with my old school friends. Traditionally we give each other small, cute gifts. Last year I made some sugar cookies and fudge however to celebrate this blogging landmark as a vaguely serious baker I figured it was time to step up my game.

At first I was dubious of baking with such a wintery flavour in (what should be) the beginning of Summer here in Sydney however thanks to much unprecedented and rain below-average temperatures I had no qualms whatsoever getting my gingerbread on. This recipe should make around 20-25 macarons, depending on the size.

GINGERBREAD MACARONS

(an original recipe)

 Gingerbread Shells

100g egg whites, room temperature

100g almond meal

200g pure icing sugar

30g caster sugar

1 tsp powdered egg whites

1 heaped tsp ground ginger

Powdered/gel colouring

White Chocolate Ginger Ganacahe

200g white couverture chocolate, chopped

100ml pouring cream

1/2 tsp cinnamon (plus extra for dusting)

1/2 tsp ground cloves

2 tsp ground ginger

2-3 lumps of crystallised ginger (around 10g), finely chopped

 

1. Preheat your oven 150°C.

2. Sift pure icing sugar, almond meal and ground ginger and place into a bowl and give it a quick stir.

3. Beat eggwhites and eggwhite powder in a separate bowl until soft peaks form. Slowly add the caster sugar, beating well between each addition, until eggwhites are stiff and glossy. This process should take around 5-10 minutes.

4. Pour half of your dry ingredients and colouring (I used half brown half orange gel colour) into the bowl of beaten eggwhites and combine with a flat utensil, like a spatula, using “cutting strokes”. Once incorporated repeat with the remaining icing sugar and almond meal mixture. This is where things begin to get a little tricky as under-mixing or over-mixing will ruin your macarons as they attempt to rise and “grow feet” in the oven. Experts say to stir the mixture until it becomes the consistency of lava. The mixture will be sticky but you’ll know it’s ready when, upon holding your spatula above the bowl, it will begin just begin to flow freely back into the bowl. You’ll need to knock a lot of the air out of it.

5. Prepare a piping bag with the appropriate tip (around 1 cm or less), a baking tray with baking paper, and pipe small rounds (they must be small enough to balance on the cupcakes!). If there are any small lumps left from piping wet your finger and gently press them down (unlike cake batter, macaron mixture does not flatten out when in the oven). Dust some extra cinnamon over the shells and allow tray to rest for 30 minutes.

6. Place baking tray in the oven and allow to bake for around 15-20 minutes (this time will depend entirely on your oven, so keep an eye on them). Within 5 minutes or so they will begin to grow feet.

7. Once ready, remove from oven, and after 5 minutes transfer to cooling racks.

8. Whilst your shells are cooling place your cream in the microwave for 30 seconds or until relatively hot. Pour your chopped chocolate into the bowl and stir continuously until the chocolate has melted and the mixture is combined. Add cinnamon, ground cloves, ground ginger and finely chopped crystallised ginger and stir to combine. Place bowl into the refrigerator to cool and thicken.

9. Prepare another piping bag with a large tip and neatly pipe rounds of ganache into half of the shells. To close, gently place its partner shell on top of the ganache and twist shut, taking care to prevent ganache spilling over the edges.

As well as these macarons I’ve also bundled some of my berry and vanilla infused vodka in adorable little jam jars complete with mini baubles (a fluke discovery at Coles this morning!) – a cute reminder that a cocktail-fueled Summer is just around the corner… maybe.

Sugar and alcohol. Spice and berries. Here’s hoping they like my little edible trinkets!

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